Facebook

Last year when we were in Arizona I started teaching myself to use Facebook. It's been a fun year, catching up with old friends, getting to know others better and sharing a little bit about myself with others. There have also been some light bulb moments along the way.

Some of my old friends are still so dear and I am truly sorry that I have not made the effort to maintain the relationship. I have also had the experience of reconnecting with those who put a facade, if you will, on Facebook. The real person lurks behind the front, and I have been disappointed, even hurt. The interesting thing is that those particular people used the same tactics in our previous relationships. I mistakenly assumed that those people had evolved from our youth. Hopefully I am now more aware, more sensitive and have a little more finesse than I did 35 years ago. Not everyone is.

Another part of using digital media to connect with old friends is the uncovering of your past. I have no "murders in Texas" to be worried about but do not always look back on who I was back then with much admiration. I was awkward, naive, forward and brash. Also living though the very painful divorce of my parents, I was wounded, mistrustful and needier than I realized at that time. When you walk away from the relationships of your youth, you also to leave behind some of those memories...current relationships only know what you chose to show them. Upon reconnecting, there is the chance that those parts of your life will be exposed again. Reviving relationships, in this way, forces trust. Trust that your friends will write past awkwardness off to your youth and accept the person that you are, and for me...generally, that person is someone that I am content with.